When To Trust Our Judgement
“Judgement” can be a multi-faceted concept. It can mean our ability to trust ourselves to make good decisions (have good judgement). And, it can also refer to our tendency to be judgmental or to judge ourselves, or others, as “less than,” incompetent, or “not enough,” at times.
For those of you who follow my “Life From the Top of the Mind” philosophy, you know that these two perspectives actually come from different parts of the brain. That is, our ability to make good decisions that reflect our best thinking (clarity, confidence, creativity, etc.) resides in the upper 80% of the brain (the neocortex…what I call the “Top of the Mind”). While our tendency to judge ourselves as lacking or deficient in some way (not smart enough, pretty/handsome enough, accomplished enough, etc.) comes from the lower 20% of the brain (the brainstem).
Our challenge is to use good “judgement” in determining which part of the brain to trust. When we are in a dangerous situation where we need to react without thinking to be safe, then the lower brain is absolutely what we want to trust. However, when our goal is to make the best decision possible, and/or see ourselves as trustworthy or have confidence in our worth and value, the Top of the Mind is where we want to be coming from.
To determine whether to trust a particular perspective, emotion, thought, or behavior, I suggest that we ask ourselves what I call “Top of the Mind” questions. For example:
1. Have we chosen this thought, emotion, or perspective deliberately, or on purpose, or did we just find ourselves thinking or feeling this?
2. Is this perspective helping me create the experience of life that I want?
3. Is this the statement I want to make about who I am?
4. Would I teach or recommend this way of thinking and feeling to someone I love?
If the answer is “no” to any of these questions, we can then use them to make a better decision or a better judgement. In other words, if we were choosing a perspective, emotion, or thought:
• On purpose or deliberately
• In a way that does help us create the experience of life that we want
• In a way that does make the statement we want to make about who we are and who we are becoming
• And in a way we would teach or recommend to someone we love
What would that be?
Albert Einstein said, “Problems cannot be solved at the same level of awareness that created them.” This means that we need to first understand what part of the brain we want to engage or trust in order to be able to trust our response. If we are able to use this wisdom to inform our choices, then the potential that we will make good decisions and see ourselves as worthy of trust and respect goes up exponentially. Sounds like something we would recommend to someone we love, don’t you think?
~ All the best, Dr. Bill